Yup...you know the rest of that statement. It's true. I really am. I was laying in bed last night, trying to fall asleep, and kept thinking about writing in this blog. I don't know who reads it and truthfully, I don't care. This is for me to get things out of my head and not for anyone's entertainment. If my ex reads it, with all of his narcissistic mentality, I'm sure he is thinking I still want him and in love with him. I can assure him, and everyone else, I would rather be gored by a buffalo, bitten by rabid bats and thrown into the Grand Prismatic at Yellowstone than to ever and I mean EVER be with that male again. The only thing that I have left of him is the effects of his abuse. They say that out of all abuse, emotional/mental is the hardest to heal from. I would rather be physically beaten than be emotionally and mentally abused. I still see what my last abuser told me I was. Fat. Unattractive. A bitch. To paraphrase (as his words spanned ...