Skip to main content

Life is like a box of chocolates....

You never know what you're gonna get. Truer words have never been spoken. Let's face it...life is a crap shoot. Sometimes you win...sometimes you lose. It's how you handle the losses. Some losses I have failed miserably in the aftermath. Talk about your lesson learning experiences.

Natalie mentioned something last night on her facebook about how she tries, and tries and tries with a certain friend but nothing changes. Well...it was along those lines. I'm paraphrasing. That status made me think of the past year and how with certain friends I did the same thing. No matter what I said or did those women judged me or criticizied me. Those were the women I cut out of my life after I had finally had enough. A person can only take so much and then it's time to end the relationship. So I miss those women? Sometimes. Do I regret the friendships? No. It is through the ups and downs with them that I found who I am and just what I will and will not accept. I do think "Would I have ended the friendships if I hadn't made new friends through the cruise? Would I have continued to accept being belittled and treated as sub human?" Sadly...I think I would have. I would have been of the opinion that some friends are better than no friends. Heavens I would have been so wrong!!!

I do like the direction my life took me with the ending of a couple of friendships. I'm stronger and stand up for myself more often. I'm finding that people want to be around me and those people don't pity me. For example...I had mentioned wanting to go to Vegas for my birthday next year and within 24 hours I am spending a week in Vegas with at least 8 amazing women. Instead of me finding a hotel...one friend offered up her timeshare. I have friends who are flying from Rhode Island and Texas. There are a few people who can't make it and I'm sad about that but they will be there in spirit. I've just gained so much with cleaning my life house. Will I speak poorly of the women that are no longer friends with me? No. They are who they are. They just didn't fit into my life story and who I need to be. I fully believe people are in our lives for a reason, a season or a lifetime. I'm not sad that it's over. I'm thankful for the fun and good times I had. I just know when it's time to say goodbye for not only my self preservation but for their's also.

Life is short and I don't plan on regrets. With that said....bring on Cruise to Alaska 2012!!! :) Edward and Bella Pictures, Images and Photos

Popular posts from this blog

Well I got a couple more hours of sleep. I have the best kids. They let me sleep and didn't wake me up until my cell started ringing. We went out and about today. K wanted to try Bubble Tea so I obliged her. Mistake. It is not good by any stretch of the imagination. If you don't know what Bubble Tea is....g00gle it. Once you find out...don't try it. *shudder* An expensive taste test. There is a storm heading our way. Would you believe it's supposed to snow tonight??? Snow on Easter. How odd would that be? Speaking of Easter...my girls are watching TBN (Trinity Broadcasting Network) and watching a childs version of The Passion. Even watching the crucifixtion of Christ as a cartoon it still brings tears to my eyes. I am so unworthy of what He went through for me. Well not just me but all of mankind. I saw The Passion last year and that is when I realized I needed to turn my life around. I was making a serious mess of things so I gave it all back to God. My life has had it...

love

It's a struggle knowing he didn't love me and never did.  To find out the things he does now for his wife?  The woman who is bigger than I ever was, the woman who has been married multiple times, the woman who is tatted up and he hated tats, the woman who shows jealousy, the woman he won't keep secrets from but kept them from me, the woman who is everything he said he hated in me.  Knowing all of this has made me hate him.  I know it does nothing to him.  It will only eat away at me but that has been happening to me for almost 20 years.  I can only now admit that I hate this man with every fiber of my being.    When I met him, I was in a good place.  I was happy with myself, I had friends, I loved sex and I believed in love.  In the almost 2 years I was with him, he destroyed every last bit of me.  I know it was only 2 years but in 2 years, he obliterated every bit of who I was.  Not a day went by where he didn't mentally or em...

What have I done?

I've been thinking about the things I've done in the last 20 years but, thanks to my memory, I need to make a list so I can actually see that my life wasn't completely horrible. Las Vegas 6 times Dallas for a girl's weekend Forks 4 times for girls' weekends Cruise to Alaska Cruise to Bermuda x 2 Cruise to Belize, Honduras, Mexico Road trip to South Dakota x 2 Southern California for a long weekend Nashville to judge a beauty pageant. Nascar races x 2 one being a Championship. Orlando Florida - Disneyworld and Universal Studios California - many times Leavenworth - many times Girls' weekends - many times I have more trips coming up with a cruise to Alaska and a cruise around Ireland. A weekend trip to Montana.  A girl's week to Vegas.  I'm sure there will be more to be planned. I became a Nana and will be a Nana x 2 this year.   I've been able to purchase 2 homes. Even though I have battled depression, I have had friends stand steadfast by my side and...