I was thinking on the way to work about the friendships I have had throughout my years on this big blue marble. I have a very small circle of friends and like it that way. People that I can safely say have my back and I can trust. I sometimes add to that circle but it's not often. Too much betrayal from my past prevents that.
Everyone makes friends from the moment they step foot into school. Some friendships last through the schooling process. Most of them end. While I am not close to one man I've known since Kindergarten...I can safely say he is a friend. The friends we make in high school, I believe, are the ones who you will have a lifetime. Not all of them mind you but a select few will remain through the trials and tribulations of your life.
While going through this thing we call life we meet people. Some stick around and become your closest friends and allies. Some stick around long enough to betray you, cause you to question humanity and your own choices. Most cross our paths on a daily basis through work, shopping, driving, going to the park or wherever your legs take you. If we are lucky we meet someone in our everyday lives that will change our view of our fellow man.
I've had friends who have stuck with me through thick and thin. They are people I know I can call upon during times of trial and they will be there to remind me that I have wings. I just need to remember how to use them. These are the people I cherish and value. People who I depend on to get me through my story.
Now we come to the people who are no longer in my life. In one way or another they have left my life story. Some on good terms. Life just took us in different directions. We parted amicably and all is well. Then there are those who took ending the friendship to the ultimate ending. Endings that burned bridges and caused a lot of heartache for me. Did it cause them pain? I don't know. I cannot speak for them. I still harbor bitterness and anger towards one friendship that ended. That is my cross to bear and one that I need to learn to let go. I used to question why those people were in my life. Now I understand, for the most part, why they came in and wreaked havoc upon my heart and life. I could go into a long winded, get on my soapbox rant about it but I won't. What I will say is that those friendships helped me grow as a person and to find my inner strength. It was through those people I learned to not be a doormat. To stand up for my own thoughts, opinions and desires. When I learned to do those things...my 'friends' started dropping off like flies.
I ended a friendship this summer. It was not easy for me to do but it had to be done. This person has known me as a mousey little girl who would put up with any kind of treatment handed to me. I am now no longer that mealy mouthed pansy. Me standing up for myself is not what she planned on. I felt good about how things transpired. Not good about the friendship ending but good about who I have become and what is acceptable for me.
Ending things are not fun. If a person can look at it as a time to grow and become the person we were meant to be. There is a short essay that I hold onto when friendships end:
Are Your Friends Here for a Reason, a Season, or a Lifetime?
Many of us are fortunate enough to have friends who are a consistent part of our lives throughout all our ups and downs. However, sometimes others we consider friends appear to enter, then depart from our lives for reasons we try to, but don't always, understand. This piece nicely explains the flow of people in and out of our lives.
It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.
People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. When you figure out which one it is, you will know what to do for each person.
When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally, or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend, and they are! They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any wrongdoing on your part, or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered. And now it is time to move on.
Then people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has come to share, grow, or learn. They bring you an experience of peace, or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it! It is real! But, only for a season.
LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons: things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person, and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life
Once you figure out who are reasons, seasons or lifetime...you will be a stronger and more amazing person than you ever thought you would be.
Everyone makes friends from the moment they step foot into school. Some friendships last through the schooling process. Most of them end. While I am not close to one man I've known since Kindergarten...I can safely say he is a friend. The friends we make in high school, I believe, are the ones who you will have a lifetime. Not all of them mind you but a select few will remain through the trials and tribulations of your life.
While going through this thing we call life we meet people. Some stick around and become your closest friends and allies. Some stick around long enough to betray you, cause you to question humanity and your own choices. Most cross our paths on a daily basis through work, shopping, driving, going to the park or wherever your legs take you. If we are lucky we meet someone in our everyday lives that will change our view of our fellow man.
I've had friends who have stuck with me through thick and thin. They are people I know I can call upon during times of trial and they will be there to remind me that I have wings. I just need to remember how to use them. These are the people I cherish and value. People who I depend on to get me through my story.
Now we come to the people who are no longer in my life. In one way or another they have left my life story. Some on good terms. Life just took us in different directions. We parted amicably and all is well. Then there are those who took ending the friendship to the ultimate ending. Endings that burned bridges and caused a lot of heartache for me. Did it cause them pain? I don't know. I cannot speak for them. I still harbor bitterness and anger towards one friendship that ended. That is my cross to bear and one that I need to learn to let go. I used to question why those people were in my life. Now I understand, for the most part, why they came in and wreaked havoc upon my heart and life. I could go into a long winded, get on my soapbox rant about it but I won't. What I will say is that those friendships helped me grow as a person and to find my inner strength. It was through those people I learned to not be a doormat. To stand up for my own thoughts, opinions and desires. When I learned to do those things...my 'friends' started dropping off like flies.
I ended a friendship this summer. It was not easy for me to do but it had to be done. This person has known me as a mousey little girl who would put up with any kind of treatment handed to me. I am now no longer that mealy mouthed pansy. Me standing up for myself is not what she planned on. I felt good about how things transpired. Not good about the friendship ending but good about who I have become and what is acceptable for me.
Ending things are not fun. If a person can look at it as a time to grow and become the person we were meant to be. There is a short essay that I hold onto when friendships end:
Are Your Friends Here for a Reason, a Season, or a Lifetime?
Many of us are fortunate enough to have friends who are a consistent part of our lives throughout all our ups and downs. However, sometimes others we consider friends appear to enter, then depart from our lives for reasons we try to, but don't always, understand. This piece nicely explains the flow of people in and out of our lives.
It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.
People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. When you figure out which one it is, you will know what to do for each person.
When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally, or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend, and they are! They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any wrongdoing on your part, or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered. And now it is time to move on.
Then people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has come to share, grow, or learn. They bring you an experience of peace, or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it! It is real! But, only for a season.
LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons: things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person, and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life
Once you figure out who are reasons, seasons or lifetime...you will be a stronger and more amazing person than you ever thought you would be.