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View of self

Sometime in the last year I lost me. Not because of some drama. Not because I started feeling sorry for myself. Not because of anything at all. At least not anything that people would say is typical. I used to wear cute clothes with a kind of Carrie flair. Always something a little different added to my conforming outfits. It's what made me stand out a little bit. Since moving I have yet to be the quirky me. For work I wear black pants, a sweater and non-descript black boots. Last year at this time? I never went to work without wearing 3 inch heels. Hmmmm.....

Since buying the house I've gained weight. I attribute that to losing the stress factor I had in my life. I'm working on losing the weight. It's not a lot, thank goodness, but it's just enough to make me feel not so pretty. I was completely stupid in June and decided to cut my hair off. I now regret that. What in the world possessed me to cut hair that was past my bra strap off to just under my ears? Not a bloody clue. I started taking vitamins that helps hair grow fast and it's actually working. By next August I should have my long hair back. I know that not having long hair has been a part of me feeling beige. I'm just blending in. Anyone who knows me knows that I'm not a blending in kind of person. I like to stand out. Be the flirty, fun to be around person.

I have made decisions that I will stick to and bring myself out of the beige mode I put myself in.

1. Get back into my size 6 jeans
2. Grow my hair back out
3. Get contacts (want lasik but that scares the hell out of me)
4. Quirkify my wardrobe again
5. Experiment with different makeup and find what really looks good
6. Take mini vacations throughout the year to keep myself energized


It's not a difficult list to stick to. I just need to remember to think about myself more and not get so wrapped up in other things. At the end of the day the thing that really matters is how I feel about myself. After that...everything else will fall into place.

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