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Examining

 I have tried to understand why people believe, I mean truly believe, they can say what they want about me and my family then when I get upset, they turn it back around onto me.   I'm the one who shouldn't get upset, I'm the one they are "protecting", I'm the one that they hate seeing how my family treats me, so they are responding to that.  Seriously?   I know for a fact that if I were to call any of their mom's a bitch, they would go off on me.  If I called their children assholes or bitches?  All of hells fury would rain down on me.  So, I do not understand why it's okay they do the same to me and expect me to be okay with it.  To not say anything and accept it.  

These are the very same people who tell me they "love me" and hope I find peace one day.   They have got to be kidding.   Peace, for me, are friends who do not call my children names.  Peace, for me, are friends who do not call my family names.  Peace, for me, are friends who don't talk shit about me behind my back and then are "kind and loving" to my face.  Peace, for me, are friends who don't turn on me when I have hit rock bottom.  Peace, for me, is a friend who doesn't say she doesn't have time for my shit when I'm in a very dark place.  When this stuff happens multiple times, from different people, I will never again trust anyone with my life struggles.  



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