Good Lord love a duck I'm tired!!! I have been on the go all blasted day!!! Cooked Easter dinner, went to Jamie's, came home and did some laundry, pulled weeds (which is a never ending chore), mowed the lawn and still have laundry to finish up. My body is going to rebel against me tomorrow...well more so than it already has. I hate pulling weeds with a passion and come hell or high water the area where I was stuck pulling them is going to become grass. Nice green grass...not flipping red rock!!! I hate that crap!!! Just a royal pain in the &^$!!! I do believe I am going to start painting my living room this week. I have so much to do inside and outside but just not a whole lot of time to do it. My parents are going to be here the second week of June. EEEEKKKK!!!! It's times like this when a boyfriend/husband would come in handy. LOL Last night I believe I found a great sleep aid. It's called drinking a glass of pineapple juice with coconut rum in it. :) I fell asleep before midnight and slept like a baby. I may have to do that again tonight. Not a bad way to go night night. Then again...this is where a boyfriend/husband would come in handy. ;)
It's a struggle knowing he didn't love me and never did. To find out the things he does now for his wife? The woman who is bigger than I ever was, the woman who has been married multiple times, the woman who is tatted up and he hated tats, the woman who shows jealousy, the woman he won't keep secrets from but kept them from me, the woman who is everything he said he hated in me. Knowing all of this has made me hate him. I know it does nothing to him. It will only eat away at me but that has been happening to me for almost 20 years. I can only now admit that I hate this man with every fiber of my being. When I met him, I was in a good place. I was happy with myself, I had friends, I loved sex and I believed in love. In the almost 2 years I was with him, he destroyed every last bit of me. I know it was only 2 years but in 2 years, he obliterated every bit of who I was. Not a day went by where he didn't mentally or em...