I am going to be a chaperone for a class trip. How cool is that??? I've never been personally asked so I'm diggin' this. K's class it taking a trip later this year and her teacher asked me to chaperone. A whole bunch of 5th graders...I must be out of my mind!!! K is excited about me going...so it will be worth it. House hunting can be fun and yet a royal pain in the butt also. Some of the things out there are mind blowing when it comes to how much they want for a house that needs to be condemned. Remember the place I looked at a couple of weeks ago that was in that catagory? Well today I looked at something much worse than that AND they wanted more for it!!! It's not like I live in a economically rich place. It's an agricultural area for the love of Pete!!! I have a few months to find something. I do want to be in a new place before school starts for the girls. I know God has something out there for us...it's just a matter of Him directing me to it. :) I did find a really cute house today and in my price range. When it's right....I'll know it.
It's a struggle knowing he didn't love me and never did. To find out the things he does now for his wife? The woman who is bigger than I ever was, the woman who has been married multiple times, the woman who is tatted up and he hated tats, the woman who shows jealousy, the woman he won't keep secrets from but kept them from me, the woman who is everything he said he hated in me. Knowing all of this has made me hate him. I know it does nothing to him. It will only eat away at me but that has been happening to me for almost 20 years. I can only now admit that I hate this man with every fiber of my being. When I met him, I was in a good place. I was happy with myself, I had friends, I loved sex and I believed in love. In the almost 2 years I was with him, he destroyed every last bit of me. I know it was only 2 years but in 2 years, he obliterated every bit of who I was. Not a day went by where he didn't mentally or em...