Yep...been playing with the template again. I really like Photobucket. LOL Looks like allergy season has decided to begin. I'm all stuffy and have a sore throat. I love spring but I hate my allergies. I do have a ton of meds at home so I need to get better. A friend from Bellevue is going to be in town this week and he is taking me and the girls out for dinner. No...it's not a date. He is just a friend. I haven't seen him in almost 3 years so we need to play catch up. I have the major moving bug. I want to move so badly I can almost taste it. I don't care where I move. I just want out of the freaking park I live in. Just too blasted close to someone I care to not see or even be in the same vicinity with. Daily I have to drive by her house and I'm reminded of just how foolish I was and how badly she used me. I know...something I need to get past and I will. Being that close to her keeps everything fresh in my mind. Besides...I don't want my kids near hers if at all possible. Poor J goes to school with both of them and deals with their crap at least once a week at the school and almost daily at the bus stop. At some point I will be able to move...unless she does first. She was saying she would be moving after school gets out for the summer. Pray that she does. Would make mine and my kids life much nicer. Besides...my house is starting to look great. I really don't want to start over and in a stupid apartment. :) Time to do more studying...woo hoo!!!! *yawn*
It's a struggle knowing he didn't love me and never did. To find out the things he does now for his wife? The woman who is bigger than I ever was, the woman who has been married multiple times, the woman who is tatted up and he hated tats, the woman who shows jealousy, the woman he won't keep secrets from but kept them from me, the woman who is everything he said he hated in me. Knowing all of this has made me hate him. I know it does nothing to him. It will only eat away at me but that has been happening to me for almost 20 years. I can only now admit that I hate this man with every fiber of my being. When I met him, I was in a good place. I was happy with myself, I had friends, I loved sex and I believed in love. In the almost 2 years I was with him, he destroyed every last bit of me. I know it was only 2 years but in 2 years, he obliterated every bit of who I was. Not a day went by where he didn't mentally or em...